New Game +: Author's Notes, Your Ex-Lover Is Dead

[axolotl]

Masterlist for New Game + available here.

Title: Your Ex-Lover Is Dead
Song Link: You were what I wanted, I gave what I gave
Characters: ainbthech
Word Count: ~700

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The cut tag says this but you don't see if if you come in directly: THERE ARE SPOILERS HERE. WARNING. SPOILERS.



I wrote this because of a random prompt comment in the pokemon_bigbang community, linked here. It sort of fits in with my established headcanon* for how Silver and Kotone are in a long-term non-monogamous relationship; my initial plan had just been to have TWENTY THOUSAND WORDS OF POLY DRAMA. But then I saw this and decided to try mingling drama/romance/comedy/whatever with horribly depressing violence. Hopefully that worked? :) Fanfiction is the place where I turn off the rules and push myself to try things I wouldn't do otherwise, and there are always some bits that work and some that don't work as well. (Unfortunately turning off the rules leads me to things like "I want to write all the dialogue!" not being told "No, that's unreasonable." Some of these scenes I look at and I am like "I like this but it reads almost like a script." I guess that sort of makes sense for Pokemon.) The genre-busting was fun to do, and it feels fun to read coming back to it (some of this is very recent, but some of it is a month or two old!), but I'm not sure if it will all be fun for you. If you've read this far, I hope it was worth your time. <3

I feel a little bad about how Cynthia and Black came across in here. The initial outline called for a lot more Black, in particular, being a nuanced character and not just a transphobic jerk; then again the initial outline took them all the way through Unova, which was just not going to happen for an October deadline. Dealing with Julie/N is very difficult for him, and he's more present in the world in a way that makes him angry about it where Silver just doesn't care. Since the chances I will write, well, the entire imagined plot of a new Unovan game starring Silver are very small, you should totally feel free to imagine him getting over it, calming down, and hitting on Silver, leading to awkward poly drama. "So who's sharing Silver's tent tonight?"

I cried when I killed off Green, which is moderately ridiculous, but thanks in particular to kitsuneasika I am very fond of the fellow now. Thinking about how he would age into maturity without ever losing his edge was relly interesting, and I may play more with that some other time; I like an older, wiser, still snarky Green who has SIlver's back and still loves him dearly even though the relationship fizzled out a decade ago. I was a little worried that Eevee should have been very old at this point, but decided that having an Eevee is more like having a parrot than like having a cat. (That thing where Ninetales live for a thousand years? So depressing.)

I was doing chapter ttles after songs anyway, and so in the end I decided to just make the story into also-a-mixtape, since I didn't have an artist to work with and I only had to really stretch to find one song that fit what I was going for. I may not get to this in time for the Big Bang to be over, but I'll eventually upload the nine-song mix somewhere; it's 38:43 and the transitions are a little choppy but it's quite listenable. One of the tracks (Human) I only ran into a couple of weeks ago, when a friend made me a mixtape that I've been listening to constantly as I worked to finish this story. It is just the quintessential N song to me; I still think that girl might be half-Pokemon or something. Hopefully she will figure out how to be whatever she wants to be.

I'd love to hear what you think! ...and once this is posted I will actually be able to read other people's Big Bang stories, which I have been eager to do.

Also, thanks so much to the Big Bang community and admins for making this all happen. I'm very busy and I always need a push to get me to actually do this sort of thing. Hooray! <3

Thanks for reading,

A


*If you want to see some of the stuff written that figures into my headcanon, here are a few links:

• kitsuneasika's Moments Through An Hourglass was written for me for a holiday fic exchange and was everything I could have dreamed of wrapped in a ribbon of awesome I didn't know how to dream of until I read it. Seriously.
• I then remixed it into Roaring Snow As Sand, which tries to do some similar genrequeering things to this piece but not as well.
• I love basically all of lark's work, but the story Fidelity had subconscious influence on how I handled Silver/Crobat and is still, on a reread, amazingly awesome in all ways.

Comments

[illittorate.livejournal.com]

I've been looking forward to reading this ever since I saw the summary and it did not disappoint!
I'm bad at leaving lovely detailed comments so I will apologise for my inadequacy, but I really enjoyed the fic. Firstly, the music worked well for each chapter - I listened to the songs as I read (anything that has me looping Girlfriend in a Coma is a Good Thing, tbh) and they were so effective for setting the scene. You mentioned that it's dialogue heavy - along with the soundtrack that made it feel rather cinematic, which I liked.
Some of the violence made me go D: at my screen, which is again a good thing. Kind of. And I frequently found myself having ~ALL THE FEELINGS~ so thanks for that. No really, thanks!
I would totally read a reimagined Unovan adventure but I understand you not leaping to write it! Black definitely does suffer from his cut-down role though, which is a shame because I enjoy your other characterisations. I liked that you had Julie's speakingtoofast detail. Also Cheren being the straight Pokémon trainer cracked me up.
And all the stuff about the politics or social rules or whatnot Pokémon being allowed out of their balls was interesting. Basically I like your headcanon and would like to live in it if that's not too weird.
...
Thank you for writing!

[ainbthech.livejournal.com]

Oh my god you are so welcome I am really glad you liked it!! There's this thing where you write something huge and then you put it out there and you have no way of knowing if anyone likes it or even looks at it and so your comment is totally the opposite of inadequate to me. I am really glad that you had ALL THE FEELINGS because that was sort of what I was going for? Like, sometimes the feelings were not good feelings and that can be tough, but, well, that's the kind of thing that happens when your story prompt is "Giovanni kills a bunch of people."

I'm glad the music worked! It was sort of a last-minute thing as I was getting everything together this weekend, noticing "hey four of these chapter titles are song titles already, can I... oh wow I can!" And part of the Big Bang spirit was supposed to be blending art and fiction, so even though I ended up not working with anyone else, I got to participate in it.

You are welcome to live in my headcanon if you want! I don't know how that works but good luck. :) I think of this story as out-of-canon for me just because I like Kotone and Green too much, but most everything else fits with how I already imagined it.

Thanks so much, again! <3

[ainbthech.livejournal.com]

If you really want to live in my headcanon, there are a few more stories linked in this post now (only one by me). <3

[outstretched]

FUCK WHY DID I READ THIS FIRST FUCK NO WHY /SOBS

[ainbthech.livejournal.com]

OH MY GOD I AM SO SORRY I ADDED A LARGER SPOILER WARNING ;_;

[solarpillar.livejournal.com]

This Green must be able to fit into an Antic Greece style society without trouble. His relationship with Silver felt like idealistic pederasty with smaller age gap.

Ok, I'm still not crying over Green's death, I must be sick or something.

Wait. My left eye's wet.

I lied. There was one tear. Just one though. No more. Ahem.

I enjoyed reading this fic and I'm looking forward for more fic from you. Thanks for linking the headcanon fics, I love reading them too. Imaginary cakes for you!

[ainbthech.livejournal.com]

I had not considered that angle on their relationship! I think it's a little less inequal when Silver isn't moping, but it's Silver, so he mopes a fair amount, and it's Green, so he always wants to be (looking like he is) in charge.

It's OK, I cried too, and it's an understatement to say I knew it was coming. ^^;;

Imaginary cakes! Hooray! I hope my future forays into fiction do not disappoint.

[nekusagi.livejournal.com]

Hey- I hope it's okay if I add you as a friend! I really like your work.