The registration part is where everything new about Silver and Julie/N fell into place. It would be epic. I want to say 'Write the sequel please', but maybe leaving it open like that is a better choice as it leaves room to imagination.
If there's something to complain about... It felt like there's not enough exploration. Some plot points seemed to be waved off instead of developed, like why Team Rocket decided to use guns out of the blue, why Giovanni let the fainted Silver there instead of carrying him back to the base, why Ghetsis decided to cooperate with Team Rocket and how did they meet, did they had a chat over tea and had fantabulous hate-sex or did it went like a business negotiation? Then again, this was mostly from Silver's eyes, so maybe he just wasn't observant or up-to-date in the gossips. Still, there must be ways to have more actually-first-person-third-person exploration. It'll be good to see more of that universe. We also need more... scenery? Most stimuli from this fic are meant to be simulation of stimuli to the eyes and ears, but what about touch, smell and taste? Not that I remember writing them in my fic (or maybe I did? I can't remember what I wrote), but just suggesting.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2011-11-04 03:35 am (UTC)The registration part is where everything new about Silver and Julie/N fell into place. It would be epic. I want to say 'Write the sequel please', but maybe leaving it open like that is a better choice as it leaves room to imagination.
If there's something to complain about... It felt like there's not enough exploration. Some plot points seemed to be waved off instead of developed, like why Team Rocket decided to use guns out of the blue, why Giovanni let the fainted Silver there instead of carrying him back to the base, why Ghetsis decided to cooperate with Team Rocket and how did they meet, did they had a chat over tea and had fantabulous hate-sex or did it went like a business negotiation? Then again, this was mostly from Silver's eyes, so maybe he just wasn't observant or up-to-date in the gossips. Still, there must be ways to have more actually-first-person-third-person exploration. It'll be good to see more of that universe. We also need more... scenery? Most stimuli from this fic are meant to be simulation of stimuli to the eyes and ears, but what about touch, smell and taste? Not that I remember writing them in my fic (or maybe I did? I can't remember what I wrote), but just suggesting.
Anyway, good job!