GOOD BUT I THINK HE COULD STILL DO WITH SOME PUNCHING.
That's the thing -- I'm not sure that there is a better way that wouldn't be detrimental to the rest of the story. It did mean it took me a little longer to get into it, but I think that was worth it in the long run.
Oh, definitely. I didn't mean to sound like I was possibly suggesting one would be better without the other, because that's not the case at all, I was just grumpily having a 'oh my god YOU CANNOT LEAVE ME HANGING LIKE THIS' moment.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2011-11-02 07:20 pm (UTC)That's the thing -- I'm not sure that there is a better way that wouldn't be detrimental to the rest of the story. It did mean it took me a little longer to get into it, but I think that was worth it in the long run.
Oh, definitely. I didn't mean to sound like I was possibly suggesting one would be better without the other, because that's not the case at all, I was just grumpily having a 'oh my god YOU CANNOT LEAVE ME HANGING LIKE THIS' moment.